Drop me out

This week I’ve found myself saying the term “drop me out” more then some of my other preferred phrases and combinations of words. You know the ones. Like, chic, my own name, loves it, it’s whatever, shut down, fck off, not just now, hello, get off me, and: “Gluten? Can you get this out my face?” Etc, etc

I’ve just noticed that whereas the rota for this terminology as a group is quite regular, I’ve been using that particular one way more than usual this week.

Here are some of the occasions I’ve used it:

When we played a game

So I was with my gbff’s and one of them works in advertising and I don’t know because I zoned out zzzzz, but he said something to do with steaks. I’ve literally never had a steak in my life because I quit red meat and cigarettes at like age 9, anyway he was all like: “Hey, I was trying to think of songs using steak as a replacement, just for a joke.”

He then proceeded to say some of the examples of his handy work. Like instead of Taylor’s “Shake it off” he came up with “Steak it off”. Yeah, that’s shit.

Then everyone else came up with some equally shit ones. And one of the guys who’s also a boy band member and perhaps not the brightest berry in the bush (as required when entering a boy band, although I still love him to bits), said: “I’ve got one. Shake it off my onion rings!” Unclear.

I don’t think he really got the game. Anyway I then dropped the winner. I took Drake’s “Hotline Bling”, probably one of the biggest songs of 2015, and (bearing in mind I’ve never even eaten a steak) dropped the transcendental winning line: “You used to call me on my t-bone.” So good.

Boys being boys, they simply can’t deal being beaten by a girl so spent the next three days trying to outdo me. It was to no avail naturally, but I kept getting lame text examples through. Eventually I had to say to their constant barrage of shit steak songs: “drop me out.”

Have Your Cake and Eat it

Another time was when someone came into this room I was sat in listening to music, and said: “Hey LostItGirl! We have some cake out here if you want some?”

But they weren’t using cake as a replacement for the word sex like Katy Perry or DNCE do in their popular culture musical pieces. Because let’s face it, if there was sex going on in the office I would totally have gone out simply to record it and upload it on grosspeoplehavingsex.com but sadly that wasn’t what they meant. I was offered cake. As in that bread thing with sugar. I just shot a cold, deadly stare and said the words: “drop me out.”

BBC Boredom

Another time was when the BBC were round recording at my house, like they always tend to be because I live in a house of media wankers who all went to a place called Oxbridge University, wherever that is… Something is always getting filmed by one of these people. If it’s not on mobile phones for personal use then it’s for actual footage. I can always be heard saying “drop me out” when this is happening as I hate being fckin filmed. Sadly though there are a couple of Snapchats and social media outlets that get a running commentary of everything I do and say because I’m apparently hilarious. Whatever. Get that camera out my face, “drop me out.”

We hate Kanye

Another time I’ve used it lots is over people not liking Kanye West. Like, drop me out. Sorry, what’s not to like about someone who likes a thumb in his butt and has constant Twants? I’ve combined twat, rant and Twitter there. I mean it’s great. Just a random tweet saying “we need to lower the cost of text books”. It’s genius. He’s a genius. I’ve said many times that I love a bizarre mind. And Kanye’s is second to none. I wish we could swap minds for like 20 minutes and use each other’s Twitters. It would be so fun because I’m not allowed to be overly mental on my Twitter which is lame, but I bet Kanye could give a fck!

I also had to say drop me out of the social scene for the whole of last week. I do this occasionally. If I have stuff going on and I get all crazy then full on lostitgirl comes out, and I tend to say yes to literally everything asked of me, meaning I’ll go out every night of the week doing stupid things like making out with people in reality shows or washed up pop stars and stuff. So not chic. So I had to say drop me out to most, if not all, offers that were proffered my way. I do this by just ignoring everyone.

Apparently the thought of me spending a “night in” was hilarious to my friend Al. He was like “So what do you do at home?” I was like touch all my stuff, steam my vintage collection, lie horizontally on the bed talking on the phone, hang out with my house m8’s because I actually like them, discussing dolphins, clothes and people we’d like to fck for a laugh and people we’d like to fck for serious, and finally make up dance routines to old Britney songs.

You know, normal stuff.

Drop me out. I can be normal yeah?

XO

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