Whole Foods

Just because you bought it in Whole Foods, doesn’t mean it won’t make you fat. This is true, so true.

I see people in Whole Foods shopping, and all they are doing is buying crap that’s going to give them a fat ass, but carrying it home in a brown paper bag, that says “Hey I shop here. Im totally healthy and skinny.”

No. No you are not. 80% of what you can buy in there is crap. I mean FS at the damn counter there is an array of pastries laden with, I dunno, fckin sugar or whatever that stuff is you find on most cakes, chocolate? Icing, calories,  I dunno. All the same to me.


You look to the left and there you can buy pizza. “It’s ok because it’s Whole Food pizza.”

Whole Foods 1

No. No it’s not ok. I mean don’t get me wrong it looks delicious (if you’re into that sort of thing) and probably tastes great and better than most places, as it’s all freshly prepared. But please understand, the brown paper bag with Whole Foods written on it is not magic and doesn’t suddenly get rid of calories. Ok?

But yes I’ll admit grocery shopping in Whole Foods gives you an enormous sense of distinction, and you really can’t put a price on that.

So actually fck it, crack on. But do remember Kate Moss‘ famous quote: “Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.”

So maybe go in there, avoid all that crap, buy bottled water, vitamins, quinoa and something something sans gluten to get the brown bag and just leave. It’s what I do.

PS: Then go to the big Asda and buy all that cakey, carby stuff at a third of the price. (That’s not what I do.)